Saturday, 19 December 2009

Suranga Lakmal flops in debut

By EFT correspondent reporting from Kanatta Road.

The much awaited debut of 22 year old fast bowler Suranga Lakmal ended in disaster. The Indian batsmen duly dispatched the lanky Colts and Wayamba fast bowler to all parts of the field, he was not able to bowl a good line and length or trouble the batsmen in any way. The selectors hailed Suranga as the next big thing, he has talent among them a good outswinger and the ability to reverse, so the selectors were right to pick him, however here is the inside scoop on his underperformance or rather non performance.

Suranga hails from a humble and simple family in Matara, not very well to do, he is now paid RS 150,000 as a player with a central contract, however, he has not learned how to control his sudden new found wealth and is squandering his money and time chasing after girls in Colombo nightspots. What players do in their personal time is none of the public’s business in so far as it doesn’t affect on field performance, however Suranga’s dusk to dawn exploits have led him to miss many training sessions and he has resorted to lying to get out of early morning training camps (being drunk), and has also been caught staging injuries to excuse himself from playing and training. He has also not taken advice from the team nutritionist to put on weight, this is no surprise given his increasing appetite for girls and decreasing appetite for food. The team coaches are finding it near impossible to get him to attend training camps.

If this goes on Suranga will go the way of Dilhara Fernando, an immensely talented player who fell by the wayside due to his nocturnal exploits, we hope he doesn’t.

Stay tuned for further updates.



DECOY said...

Hey Mahen,

Looks like you've taken up a new role. Way to go pal.It is good to expose the shortcomings of the game. Macho but don't forget to update us frequently on the happenings at the political scene.

I also personally don't see Sanga as a good choice for the role of captaincy.

dhamdewa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Swarnajith Udana said...

Mahen it looks like you are conveying a message (how you feel and/or how we should feel about) by changing your war/political commentary to Cricket commentary.