Saturday, 7 August 2010

LTTE handover control of Vanni to LMTE - Liberation Monkeys of Tamil Eelaam

We thought the war was over - but Monkey Problems still persist in Vanni

Darwin's theory of evolution is finally proven. . . . . in Vanni!

EFT have been reliably informed that surviving LTTE members in Vanni have evolved to a much higher life form, thanks to GOSL creating an environment conducive to macro evolution, since May 2009. They have moved several steps towards civilisation, demonstrated undisputedly by their nobler behaviour. Experts who have been observing these higher life forms have reported that instead of abducting innocent children from poor civilians at gun-point (to use as cannon fodder for a lost cause) they now only pinch "vegetables" and "meagre belongings" while the people are not looking. It is therefore conclusive that these higher forms of monkeys are vegetarians in contrast to their cannibal ancestors who were (almost) totally annihilated by SLDF in May 2009.

There is little doubt that the "resettled" people of Vanni are relieved because this new "Monkey Problem" is far better than the horrific monkey problems they continually experienced before May 2009.

EFT kindly advise Tamilnut website to encourage the die-ass-pora Tamil community from Tooting to Toronto to divert their funds for sufficient supplies of quality peanuts to keep these monkeys evolving until they reach the same level of evolution as an average monkey. May we suggest the compensation money paid to our esteemed McHunger striker be invested in this venture?

For those of you who are sceptical of this news, please see below for completely independent confirmation.


1 comment:

Ananda-USA said...

Bravo, Mahen!

Welcome to life! An erudite sensible post at last!

Yes, indeed, monkeys not fed peanuts at even a minimal level, tend to develop fangs which we may have to extract yet again.